Ask JFS: Assist Elderly Parents with Help of Jewish Family Service

Ask JFS: Assist Elderly Parents with Help of Jewish Family Service

Dear JFS,

I just returned home from a visit with my parents who live in another city. I was really troubled by it. My mother’s beautiful and immaculate home was in shambles. She admitted that she’s having difficulty cleaning her home but became angry when I asked if she needed some assistance. She insists that she can still cook for my dad and herself, although I had to remind her several times that dinner was still cooking on the stove. Dad’s health is not good, but he just says that “your mom and I are getting along just fine.” I left them feeling frazzled and afraid. How can I help them when they insist they don’t need anything?

Frazzled

 

Dear Frazzled,

Your situation is not uncommon. It is hard for any adult to give up their sense of independence. It sounds like your parents are still able to live at home, but they may need a little assistance. Let a JFS counselor help you. First, with your assistance, you and a counselor can visit your parent’s home. The counselor can help guide you in voicing your concerns to your parents in a manner that doesn’t exacerbate bad feelings between family members. After working through some feelings and concerns the counselor can make some recommendations that can assist your parents. This summer JFS will be launching the J-Silver ticket, designed to help Jewish seniors stay at home and stay connected to community. One part of the ticket will be housekeeping services, which will be offered at a reduced rate. Menorah Park has agreed to collaborate with JFS to provide this service. Your parents would benefit from this service. The JFS counselor will make recommendations to have a housekeeper come for a few visits. Then, after the service has been completed, you can all sit down again to see how this service worked for your parents. Open communication with the help of a counselor will give all of you reassurance that your parents can live at home safely. More housekeeping visits can be purchased if everyone agrees it is beneficial. Keep looking for information this summer about the J- Silver ticket. There are exciting services coming for Jewish seniors very soon!

JFS can be there to provide support and improve your life. Just give us a call at 330-867-3388 and let us help you!